The Guy Stuff – Beyond Chapter (Loser’s Page)

Posted: July 28, 2012 in Movie Reviews
Tags: , ,

I have been a reader as well as a character of this story.Being a character has many disadvantages,being  a mute spectator to what is happening to you in the story is not so easy and this is one desperate attempt to stop yourself from being bashed up by yourfriend who thinks he is one hell of an author.This is your loser speaking…

Before you get to know what all we had to endure in the journey to the Paradise city let me make some things clear. First things first it’s not that he’s the hero and we all are sidekicks. We all share equal screen space.

Secondly, I was always against drinking till third year of my college.I used to be very truthful to my parents.I never spent a single rupee of my dad in decadent pursuits.I wanted to be conservative, I valued our culture and morals and I loved being called a model student by everyone.Then Priya came.

Right now,two years since we making love,oops,had to find a English equivalent for Love pandrathu,two years since we were committed,I am happy that one of my friends is a gay and I feel we are part of a revolution, in India atleast.

So you think Priya made me a spoilt brat?May be yes. I lied to my parents for the first time on the day we went for the ‘date’.It was so unbecoming of me when I said over the phone to my dad while returning home that I was near Guindy while I had actually reached only Nandanam.But all is fair in love and war, lies became multiple,layered and unconscionable as days progressed.

I know she is not the one for me.She loves kissing her dog but not me.She loves a dark Rajnikantreforming women with his  one-liners brimming with male chauvinism but she hates me for one, I am dark and two,I speak those punch dialogues whenever I feel she dominates me.

She is also a techie and says if she had not loved me she would have married her cousin,a research scientist based in US according to her parents’ wishes.Whenever I tell her I got a hike this month, she reminds me that her cousin earns exactly what I do with two more zeroes at the end of the number.

I am not handsome for her,I am not rich, and she adds that I lie too much to her and I want to really know why she loved me,if she really did.These questions used to pester my brain during my training days in Mysore and what followed was a reign of inferiority complex over me whenever I talk with her.I wanted to escape from reality so I used to sleep for 10 hours a day even during the day before the intermediate compreexam.But how long, will sleep rescue you?Vikram introduced me to the world of booze.Thank you Vikram.

Vikram is a complex fellow,he thinks he judges you impeccably and reads everything from your face and knows everything about you.He still does not know I smoke even during office hours especially in his absence.Why do I smoke in his absence?I wanted to prove that Istill have a habit that is unknown to him.He is too conscious of his intelligence and tries to belittle me all the time,calls me ‘Loser’.Am I a loser?I still have not lost Priya one and half years after she told me straight on my face that she loves me because she is the most sympathetic creature in the world.

I have not fought over the word ‘loser’ with him because I don’t mind whatever he calls me or thinks of me.Whyfriendship?No.The bank account which we four maintain consists of his money primarily.I have not transferred more than 200 to it in last 4 months put together.I am the one who feeds on his money during every trip we go .I am still the loser,ain’tI,hahaha?

Why do I eat his money?Am I selfish? May be I save less.I love eating at ThalapakattiBiriyani for 60 bucks, Priya loves eating the same at the Barbeque Nation.She is rich, but I spend for her because I wouldn’t allow her to do, fearing she might start talking about her cousin again if I don’t.

So I spend more for the one who troubles me and less for the one who save me from it?Am I selfish?Or am I thinking too much? May be I drink because I think too much.

Alex, he is a gay. I have no worries for him being a gay. I was the last one to get committed in my college, so wherever I go, I go with guys.CCD,couple seats inEscapecinemas,Pubs I used to go with these guys.Many actually thought I was the gay fellow in the gang till Priya came.She changed my life.

I liked Alex; he always comes to my rescue when I am the butt of Vikram’s so called jokes.His physique and the way he carries himself, reminiscent of Vikram, not this frail self-proclaimed writer, I am talking about Vikram,theTamilactor.SudhishKamath called Vikram a gay while reviewing Bheema for his tattoo reading ‘Chinna’ in his chest.Does the analogy work?

Mega,I named him Mega.None knows that.I hate listening to Rap songs even in Pubs but this guy made it interesting for me,especially after one day he came up with his own composition which was a paean that spoke about my chemistry with Priya, on my birthday.I read it to her once we met on a RakshaBandhanday; she had four extra Rakhis at the end of the day.She looked at me in response to that song,as though she might tie all of them on me.She lacked taste,or perhaps she hated our chemistry.

Oh…She keeps cropping up again and again.It always happens when you are high.Had a quarrel last night with her as well. Let me leave now and before that, I am sure this guy would invite more controversy from his own characters who might invade this space out of the blue like me and save themselves the blushes.Anyway thanks for the booze, Vikram.


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