What the *Beep* Part-14

Posted: October 3, 2011 in Movie Reviews

I was still feeling dizzy and my eyelids were so heavy. It was very dark but I could see light at a far end. I rubbed my eyes to look at the light clearly. It took me ten more minutes to regain my senses.

I was lying under the tree. The light that I sensed at the far end was actually rising of the sun. I could see a board but it was hazy and I couldn’t spot what it is. I went near to see it. The place seemed familiar to me. Only then I realized that I was lying in my college bus bay.

I immediately started searching for my friends. After roaming here and there I saw Arun in a tree branch. He was happily sleeping there.

Me: Arun wake up!

Arun: Dude why are you waking me up so early. It’s still dark outside.

Me: Outside? Idiot we are lying outside. Get down.

Arun: He he. You are talking like a drunkard. Say ‘get up’.

Me: No I’m right. Look down.

Arun: F***.What am I doing here? Save me man. I can’t get down. I’m afraid of heights.

I pacified him for quite some time. He got down after a great struggle.

Arun: Where the f*** are we?

I pointed at the college gate.

Me: At the doors of Azkaban.

Arun: Is this a time to joke, where is my dress and why am I wearing an oversized brief of Raj? By the way where is Raj?

Me: God knows…. Wait… God… Let’s look inside the temple.

Raj was cuddling a dog and was having a sound sleep.

Arun: Ha ha look he’s wearing a bra.

Me: Ya why is he? Ok wake him up first.

Arun: Raj wake up. Wake up you b******.

Raj: White bra… White…

Arun: Shit. Even now he’s talking about bra. Remove it man.

Raj: No it’s mine.

Me: Oh man! he’s yet to come to his senses. Leave him.

Arun: He’s wearing my pant. Let me remove it.

Me: Shhh keep quiet, let me think.

Raj had a cell in his pocket which had 24 missed calls. I tried calling Varun but it was of no use. His line was busy.

Our college watchman woke up in the meantime and so we couldn’t come out of the temple.

Me: Oh s*** its Varun’s cell. Let me try calling Vinoo.

Vinoo took the phone in first ring.

Me: Vinoo just listen. Something terrible has happened. We are in the temple opposite to our college gate. Get the ID cards of Raj, Arun and me and come immediately.

Arun: Ask him to bring me dress.

Me: Ya bring two shirts and a pant.

Vinoo: Dude, are you serious? What are you talking? What are you doing there at 5:30?

Me: Even I don’t know. Try to get hold of Varun and bring him with you.

Vinoo: Ok fine.

Vinoo and Varun came after half an hour.

Watchmen: Hey you! Wait. What are you doing here at this time?

Vinoo: We came here to pray uncle. We have our practical exam today.

Our watchman likes to be addressed as Uncle and he was fond of Vinoo so he allowed him.

Vinoo: What the *beep* are you doing here?

Raj: Varunnnnnnnnnn what is that red round in your face.

Varun was severely bruised. He was very angry looking at us.

Varun: You b******* don’t you know why I’m bruised. You &^$^# &$&%$ &$&.

Arun: Why is he so tensed? What happened?

Varun: You want to know what happened. I’ll tell you what happened. First give my cell phone.

Saying so, he snatched his cell phone and started telling what happened last night.

Previous Night


Varun: Even though liquor is not tasty there is something special about it. Feels good man.

He asked his roommate to close all the doors and sleep in the hall.

Varun: These guys are in deep sleep, let’s not disturb them. Don’t forget to wake me up tomorrow morning.

He too fell asleep.


Me: Varunnnn Varrrrun get up.

Varun: Has it become morning so soon?

Varun checked the clock it was 11PM.

Varun: S*** what the hell are you guys doing. When did you all wake up? Why are you staring at me like zombies?

Me: Varunnnn Varrrrun go buy whisky.

Raj: I want brandy.

Arun: For me rum.

Varun: What? Have you guys gone nuts? Its 11 now, all shops would’ve been closed? Shut the f*** up and sleep.

Me: Shhhhh how dare you raise your voice?

RaJ: Give that rope, let’s strangle him.

Raj began to strangle him with the ID card. Varun was hardly able to breathe.

Varun (coughs): OK Ok please don’t kill me. I’ll buy whatever you want.

Arun: Better. If you try to escape we will break this computer. Come soon.

Varun came with the drinks in half an hour.

Raj: Oh oh!Limca has got over.

Me: Varunnnn Varrrrun…

Varun: Please man… All the shops are closed and we have our exam tomorrow. Let me sleep.

Arun: Ok leave him. Let’s use this.

Raj: Hmmm colourful…

They both started mixing whisky, brandy, rum with Benadryl and made a colourful cocktail. We finished it in no time.

Me: Varunnnn Varrrrrun… dance.

Varun: dance at night 12’o clock. Please man let me sleep.

Raj: Dance or else I’ll strangle you.

Varun: Ok ok I’ll dance.

Raj started to play his condom music; Arun too joined Varun and suddenly Arun started to strip.

Varun: Arun! Wait!What are you doing? Please no! OH shit.

Me: he he Arun’s a new born baby now.

Raj: I’ll save my friends a**.

Raj gave the brief that he was wearing.

Me: Hah now Raj has become a new born baby.

Arun: Now it’s my turn to save you a**, have my pant. Enjoy.

Raj: Varun. I want a bra.

Varun: What? Do you mean brandy? You already have drunk a truck load full of it.

Raj: No, bra. Whiteeeeeee bra.

Varun: What the *beep*. Where will I go for it?

Raj: I don’t know. Get me or else I’ll ….

Varun: Fine fine. You guys are killing me.

He got one by jumping to the next building which is a ladies hostel. Raj wore it.

Arun: Wak

Arun vomited.

Varun: The last thing that can happen.

Arun: I’ll clean don’t worry. You sleep.

Varun: Its ok I’ll do it. Please don’t make a bigger mess of it

Arun pushed Varun aside and started cleaning with his own dress and threw that dress outside. Then Varun had to bathe him. It was about 3’o clock when all these things got over.

Me: Ok now we’ll go to our room and sleep. We don’t like to disturb you. You be careful.

Raj: Give me your cell Varun. Once we reach home you call and tell us you’re safe.

Varun: I should tell… Oh my god.

Saying so, we locked him in the room along with his roommate and left the room.

Present day

Me: How did we end up here?

Varun: God knows.

Vinoo: Everything is ok. But why did he ask for a bra, that too a white bra in specific. Something fishy!


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